learned something about myself tonight

Today I had a meeting and I learned a bit about myself that, I knew was true but hearing someone else say it was wow! I have always looked at other people including friends as being above me. I guess you could say that I have never felt that I measured up to anyone. This was the phrase that opened my eyes just a bit.

"the ground at the cross is even ground. It isn't that which makes us different it is the fact that in some areas we are closer to God and in other areas we are farther apart."

So just because I look at life differently and may choose different avenues to go down doesn't make me less of a human but just a different one. I have always had a problem with wanting to please others. It doesn't matter who you are I want you to like me, I guess you could say because I think that will make your oppinoin of me better. I am trying to live a different life. A life that is centered on a relationship with God and the rest will fall in place. WOW! Ok here is another revelation, I don't have to understand everything. This is a hard one because I like to understand something before I go out and do it or use that information. I like learning new things. Heck, soon I will hopefully be able to call myself a teacher and I will have to say that I don't understand some things. I know growing up I thought my teachers knew everything. It makes me feel kind of small, actually itty bitty. Oh there is one more thing, how do you deal with the uncertainty of situations? Do you know how you deal with them? Well I usually avoid at all cost and let the worry fester inside for well forever. I am going to ask myself from now on what does God want me to learn? What did he say he will do in these types of situations?

I know, I know a lot to think about but an hour and a half is a long time when you think about it but actually it goes by really fast.